Grief is not a one-size-fits-all process. What works for one person might not work at all for the next. That's important to remember if you have a friend who's dealing with the loss of a loved one. You want to be there for them, but you might not know how. That's okay. Helping a friend through grief is a learning process. The most important thing you can do for your friend is show up. That's it. Be there for them. Beyond that, you'll have to take each step one at a time until you find out exactly what your friend needs from you. Here are three things you should remember while you're helping your friend deal with their loss.
It's easy to say things like "they're in a better place" or "things will get better," especially when you don't know what else to say. Unfortunately, those statements – while easier for you to say – aren't necessarily what your friend needs to hear right now. For one thing, you can't guarantee that things will get better. Instead, give your friend simple truths that they can cling to. Tell them you love them, that you're there for them and you're sorry that they're hurting.
You Can't Fix It
No one wants to see their friend in grief-stricken pain. You want to fix everything for your friend and take away their pain. Unfortunately, you can't. All you can do is be there for them. Instead of trying to take their pain away, find simple ways to bring them peace in the moment. Curl up on the couch and watch a movie with them, or just sit quietly, knowing that's all you can do in the moment.
You want to reach out and help your friend. To do that, you need to be proactive. That means telling your friend what you'll be doing instead of telling them to call if they need anything. Most likely, your friend will not call to tell you what they need, which means those needs they do have may go unmet. Find out when your friend's mail arrives or when the trash is picked up and show up on those days to take care of those tasks for them.
If your friend is dealing with the loss of a loved one, there are small and simple things you can do to help them through their pain. Use the tips provided here to help your friend through the grieving process, or connect them to a grief counselor, like those at Brown Funeral Home.Share